The REAL Reasons for Drug Use

Want to read something funny? Then see the two articles that BOTH ran in the Globe today. Curious stuff. Because it seems that drug use of our youth is YOUR fault, and my fault. The only thing we can do anymore is to make sure that our children are getting a pure product. I mean, you want nothing but the best drugs for your children. Right?

1. In the article After school, many children on own, the reason all of these kids are on drugs in the first place is because their parents work. I mean, you really can't expect a 12 year old not to become a drug addict if he has to make his own after-school snack.

I have this to say:

Has anyone considered that the REASON these kids cannot wholesomely entertain themselves is because these parents have been so busy making play dates, taking vacations without their children, and removing these children so far away from their extended families that they wouldn't know their cousins if they fell over them? These children do not know how to go outside and play with the kids down the street unless it involves a trip in a minivan and a soccer field. What ever happened to street hockey in the local park tennis courts? Are there even local park tennis courts anymore? If not, I suggest you move.

People wonder why they never see their neighbors anymore. They are curious as to why little Mikey never goes over to little Johnny's house to play. I know why. The last time your darling child was over there, he hit his head running through the house. He told Mikey's mother that he was going to sue. When Johnny cam home and told you what happened, you called Mikey's mother and actually told her you were taking him to the Emergency Room (even though he only needed an ice pack) and you were sending her the bill. If she didn't pay it, you WERE going to sue. No wonder no one wants your kid around. And it's a big surprise he's going to grow up to be a drug addict.

2. On another (but related) front, users of Ecstasy are very concerned about the purity of the drug. The remedy to some of the bad reactions to tainted Ecstacy is the development of testing kits to check the purity of the drugs they are using. The police are also very concerned about the increase in hospitalization of Ecstasy users. I'm not kidding.

This is an easy one. You use drugs, which we ALL know is bad for you. If you get bad drugs and die, that is fine with me. It is another example of natural selection, as you have proved that you are too dumb to live. Not to mention that my insurance premium will greatly decrease know that you will no longer be making trips to the hospital. Idiot.